Sam's Infamous Diary
by SeddieSaxie
Summary: Sam writes in a diary Freddie gave her and argues with her self about her feelings towards him. Seddie!
1. Fish Lover

**So… this is the first of a new diary thing I'm writing for my friend PrincessSeddie and or littleprincessunicorn 's site. (See homepage for link.) **_**Oh ya… and Kels LAST TIME I'm uploading it next complaint stays up It's late and some of us have to get up early tomorrow...**_** It's the diary of Sam. In this she argues with her self, that's what the italics mean. ****Her site has this entry in an amazing diary that moves, has insanely awesome effects, and of course is full of my writing… Go check it out… like now or I'll set Sam on you with her butter sock. Would you want that? Yeah I didn't think so.**

**Go on the homepage, then click dreaming of seddie.**

**NOTE: Isn't up on site yet will be soon though .**_**SEE KELS IT IS ON HERE. (Had to be said because she keeps saying I didn't say it wasn't up yet.)**_** DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT AND HAVE NEVER CLAIMED TO OWN ICARLY OR ANYTHING RELATED TO IT.**

Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Sup they call me Sam. You must be the paper I'm writing on.

…

Right that's what I thought.

So anyway, this extremely hot friend of mine… I mean this really dorky dude I know gave me this diary. When he handed it to me he was all, "Merry Tuesday, have a diary. I know you're not going to write in it, but you can have it."

So I was all, "I'll bet you being locked in a giant glass box, I totally will... But only because seeing you locked in a glass box like a science experiment, brings me joy."

So we shook hands, as we always do when we start a bet, and here I am writing in this … *** sigh *** diary.

Bacon lovers of the world unite… Sam

Tuesday, April 06, 2010 (Later)

It's me again… Ya no Sam?

Yes I remember you, you're the dork loving girl.

I'm not dork loving…

Yes you are.

AM NOT. BUT MY POINT IN BEING HERE IS…

Well… after you said I was a dork lover I don't know if I should tell you…

Oh come on suddenly I'm not trust worthy?

Well it has mocking potential I guess, that's all.

You can tell me, I'm only you talking to your self like a crazy person.

That's true.

So today Freddie (the dork) got a haircut. It's SO cute… I mean it's so… dorkish. He looks even more like a dork than the day he was born with a little book in hand, and a little pencil behind his ear.

Now we both no that's not true, it's like you forget I'M YOU, and I was kind of… there when you were looking at his baby pictures yesterday.

I SO didn't do that… That was… Gibby… dressed as me because… he has… a creepy man crush on Freddie and… and… I let him model after me because… because…

Out of excuses are we?

NO.

Yes you are.

No I was getting to what happened next.

Oh really? Then do go on.

Fine, I will.

Well you just go ahead and do that.

I will.

_Go on_.

With what?

What's the end of the sentence?

Oh that…

Yes that. What's the end of that sentence?

What sentence?

You let Gibby model after you because…

Hey look a floating ham!!!

Where I don't see one?!?

Right there.

_There isn't one_.

Yes there is.

N- HEY!

What?

_You changed the subject_.

What subject.

_The one we were just on_.

We weren't on a subject, we've always been talking about Spider Man… I mean floating ham.

Right…

Yep.

_So you were looking at Freddie's baby pictures?_

Yes, why?

_HA!_

What?

You admitted you were looking at them.

Did not…

Did too.

…Did not.

Now you're just lying to yourself… literally.

Oh just shut it.

We both know that's not going to happen. So why exactly are you here again?

Freddie got a cute hair cut.

_Exactly._

… I meant the dork got a dorky haircut, duh.

_I'm sure you did._

Yes I did.

_Then it's settled, you like Freddie. _

Yes… I mean no.

_Sure you don't._

I don't, I swear.

_Ham lovers honor?_

How about we go with fish lovers honor?

… _Sure why not._

Then it's settled you like Freddie.

_Yes it is._

Okay then.

Bacon lovers unite… Sam

**Now go to her site you'll like it. AND review please.**


	2. Chapter 2

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

So today was the last day of the bet. I walked in to Carly's where he sat on the couch, staring with a bored blank expression on his face, staring at they TV as the pictures flew across the screen. I walked over to the chair across the room and sat in it. After a few minutes of silence I broke it with "I won the bet." He shot back immediately with "Then hand over the diary, so we can see if you're lying," he shot back immediately, with out even taking his eyes off of the TV, as if he had some magical marshmallows that could tell the future.

"What you don't trust me?" I replied in shock of how quickly he said that, and in the manner that he said it in.

I reached over and turned manually turned off the TV.

"Well you are Sam, so I'm going to have to see the proof," he stated finally breaking his stare into the darkness of the black box before us.

"No, you can't read it. It's a diary, you wouldn't like if I read yours."

"Then how am I supposed to know that you really wrote in it?" he questioned.

"By trusting me."

"Just give me it, I can handle a few drawings of me being attacked by a zebra, or what ever other shenanigans you have me getting into," he said as he stood up and grabbed the book out of my back pack that I had set on the ground just minutes before.

I quickly realized what he had done, and before he could even open the front cover I had him pinned to the ground. "Give it back Benson," I shouted as I grabbed for the book that he was holding above his head, trying to read what I had written.

He started to read it aloud, "Tuesday, April 06, 2010 Su-"

"Obviously I've written something. Now hand it over," I cut him off in mid sentence.

"Awe but now I wanna know what it says," he said proceeding to read aloud, "They call m-"

"Hand it over right now or I'll take the glass box I lock you in and put it in the nearest body of jelly," I cut him off once more.

He didn't respond this time. He just stared at the words on the page as if he were…

I took off my shoe, and then proceeded to smack him in the face with it.

His didn't move, didn't say a word…

After a few minutes he turned the page…

At this point the fury with in me was beginning to boil.

I Sat silently until he handed me back the book.

Then with a smirk on his face he uttered the words that I knew were coming… The words I dreaded most of all.

"Gibby was dressed up as you?"

… Or so I thought.

"Um… sure?" I responded hesitantly.

I stood up with my diary in hand, grabbed my backpack and walked out the door.

Hoping that he hadn't gotten that I…

Bacon lovers unite… Sam


	3. Awkward

**DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN iCarly, Be pretty awesome if I did though.**

Friday, April 16, 2010

So… it's been like three days since Freddie read my diary… I keep waiting for him to say something about it, ask a question, or even mock me in his dorky yet somewhat cute manner. I mean… in his utterly annoyingly dorky manner.

It's so awkward. I know that he's figured it out, whenever I walk into a room he either makes up some dumb excuse about why he's leaving. Generally it's something like "I have to go dress shopping with my mom," or "I think my house is on fire… I gotta go." Why is he avoiding me?

Yesterday I walked up behind him when he was at his locker and I was all "Hey Freddie." He turned around like he was expecting someone else, he even started to speak, "Hey di-" Then he stopped mid-sentence and gave another one of his lame excuses. "I promised my mom I'd be home right after school, I'm already running late." He said as he started to speed walk away. "Talk to you later Sam," he said as he turned around the corner, and was no longer in sight. It might have been a valid excuse if it hadn't been about thirty seconds after the end of second period.

Today I walked in to the iCarly studio for the show, and he was doing some weird tech thingy as usual. "Hey Carly, Hi dork," I said as I entered the room, and took my place next to Carly. "Oh… Hey Sam," he replied as if he wasn't even expecting me to be there.

The whole show I kept catching him looking at me, and then quickly looking away, as if he were trying not to get caught. But the only thing I can't figure out about it is, so what if he got caught? Is it so bad that he was noticing my existence again?

I'm so longing to just go up to him and come out with it, just say the question that is eating me up from the inside out. "Why are you acting so strange? Is this because of what you read in my diary?" I'd ask. But I'm only me, I may act like some big tuff girl, but I'm really just a coward like Carly.

Bacon lovers unite… Sam


	4. Bacon Ah

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT own **_**iCarly**_**, or anything related to it. I also do not own **_**Friends **_**although if I did I be the awesomest person EVER. Cause, you know, think about it, if both **_**Friends**_** and **_**iCarly**_** came from one person, that person would be the awesomest person in the history of…well ever. Anyway I DON'T OWN **_**iCarly **_**OR **_**Friends**_**!** Saturday, April 24, 2010

Bonjour! Hmmm… I don't know about that greeting, not really me is it? Okay I'll try that again then.

Hiya! … Better? Or should I try yet again? Na I'm too lazy to do it again. So deal with it!

Okay so… The most amazing thing happened yesterday. Now I'm not going to tell the whole story because that would take forever, but I'll just give you an idea of what happened.

So it was a normal Friday afternoon, and I had figured out a way to make it less awkward between Freddie and I, well actually I had two but the one I did just seemed the more logical of the two.

The first one was like what Rachael did to Joey on that one _Friends _episode. You know the one where he told her that he was in love with her and it became really awkward? Then Monica told her that she should go to Joey with a problem and maybe it would help it go back to normal. But then she couldn't think of a problem, so she told him that her boss wanted to buy her baby? Well I could go into more detail but I don't really feel like it, but that was the episode. Anyway I was going to try that on Freddie, but I had the same dilemma… the only problem I had was the awkwardness between us… well that and I ran out of the new bacon flavored jelly beans yesterday.

But the other option seemed to work a little better than I had hoped! I simply put a note in Freddie's locker that said:

Freddie,

Meet me at my house at 7 PM tonight. Don't be late!

Forever,

Sam

He seemed to listen to most of the note pretty well although he was a little late. Sadly I started to think that he wasn't coming and I started to ball my eyes out like a little child that doesn't get it's way. But thankfully he seemed to either not notice it, or he was just nice enough not to mention it, but either way we didn't have to talk about why there were used tissues all over my living room, and I looked as if I had been crying.

He came in and we talked about what had been going on with us lately. Then he said that he liked me, and a bunch of other stuff, but most importantly… he likes me! I'm ever so happy! Haha okay I just said that and I couldn't even help but laugh at "I'm ever so happy!" it sounds so old fashioned.

Then we kind of made out a little… and it was amazing! Although you can't "kind of" do anything, but still, we made out. But, I swear he's been practicing; he's gotten a lot better than the last time we kissed. Then he asked me if it meant that I liked him too, and I simply said "If I say yes," "Will you kiss me like that every day?" and he replied with "Of course." Sadly he had to go a little while later, but it was the most amazing night ever.

In other news, did you know that there's a whole line of bacon-flavored things that aren't really made out of bacon? I sure didn't. There's even bacon flavored Vodka or something like that. I hear it's gross but I'm still gong to have to try it some time, but until that time comes I'm just going to have to enjoy all of the other items that are bacon flavored.

Happier than any amount of meat could make me… Sam

**I hope you liked it! Sorry I haven't up dated in a while but ya know, you can't do anything about it. So that sucks for you. Anyway if you haven't read Freddie's new entry go do that not! Or I'll sent an axe murderer… er after you so that they can cut up watermelon and throw it at you until you go read it - and review of course. But not just on that one no, on all of my stories and chapters that you have read. Yes, I know that's just so cruel of me but whatever I don't care. No one ever said I was a nice person, now did they? But if anyone has they must be a mental patient or something, you know one that's crazier than me, even though it's pretty hard to be.**


	5. One Handed Pirate

**DISCLAIMER: I still do not own **_**iCarly**_**. I know it's depressing, and every day that I don't you're dying a slow painful death, but it's okay, knowing that you are dying a slow painful death because of it I can go on living a full and happy life! So thank you for that. My pudding cup and I are very glad that you would sacrifice so much for us. Once again I DO NOT own **_**iCarly**_** or anything related to it.**Monday, April 26, 2010

So… You know how I hate Mondays. But, this Monday has got to be the best Monday in the history of all Mondays. Well… maybe next Monday will be better, one can never tell. But this Monday is better than a Monday with out school. Yeah, it's been that great.

Why is it so great you ask? Oh well I can answer that in one word, a very simple word. And that word would be… Freddie!

I used to hate how many classes we have together, and how the teachers always put us as partners, but now I love it. We had partners in most classes today, and as normal the teachers said we had to be together. It was awesome. Although it wasn't like it normally is when we get put as partners. Normally Freddie's all about finishing the assignment, but this time I had to tell him that we needed to start working, and stop playing with my hand under the table. Can you believe that? Although when I said this we had five minutes left of class and there was no way that we were going to get it finished. So we just decided to do it later, and it was no longer my hand but his hand on account of he wrote his name on it.

Then at lunch instead of kicking each other under the table from opposite sides, we sat next to each other and I leaned on him the whole time. I never noticed how comfortable that boy is! But it's true you wouldn't think so with all that muscle but he it. By the way, did you know that Freddie had muscles? Lots of them, he's actually very strong. I asked him how I had always beat him for so many years if he's so strong and he said that he's been letting me win because he didn't want to hurt me and didn't want to wreck my fun. How sweet is that! But I still think if he tried that I could beat him so we're on for a rematch later. I'm so going to win.

In other, still related, news, we told Carly today. But when we told her she already knew because of how we had been acting, and she won a bet with Spencer. Apparently her and Spencer had an on going beat about whether or not we were going to eventually get together. Spencer said that we wouldn't because we hate each other, and Carly said we would because we don't actually hate each other. I thought this was ridiculous, but whatever.

One Handed Pirate… Sam

Well there you go yet another chapter, and you didn't have to wait months! What a joyous day it must be for you. Anyway hope you liked it. Please Review! And go read Freddie's new Journal entry if you haven't yet.

** Anonymously (yeah I don't know if that's spelled right) Hilarious… Saxie : D **


	6. Dear

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT own iCarly, or anything related to it. Or Anne Frank, but I don't think I need a disclaimer for using a persons name… do I? I don't think so. Oh well, I do not own Anne Frank…. CELERY… And no I do not like celery: it tastes like grossness. ** Thursday, April 29, 2010

I wonder if any one actually starts their diary entry with "Dear Diary" anymore. How weird would that be? Then there would be someone dorkier than Freddie (and Nevel of course, boy does that boy have problems). I know some people used to, like Anne Frank always started her diary entries with "Dear Kitty" Kitty of course being what she called it. But has anyone else ever done that? That'd just be weird.

You'll never guess what Carly won from that bet! Now Spencer has to wear a penguin suit for a week. A Week! See told you, you would never guess. It's so funny not only because Spencer is in a penguin suit, but also because when ever he sees Freddie and I together he glares at us and says "I'll get you for this one day," or "This is all your fault." I never though Spencer would have a vengeance on anyone but Chuck, but apparently he has.

In other news… Mrs. Benson found out about Freddie and me. Apparently she reads his "journal" and he wrote something about Monday night in it, and she read it, of course. So now I'm not allowed over with her not home anymore, and even if she is home we're not allowed in a room with out her. Yeah that's right she has to be in the room with us at all times. How much fun can we have then? I guess we'll be spending a lot more time at my house than expected. I'd throw a mustard sandwich at her but she'd probably like it too much. She'd probably turn it into sauce then eat it!

In need of bacon sauce… Sam

**I know I know, not ever seddie, but what ever I don't care. There's more seddie packed into this one page than there is in a whole episode of **_**iCarly**_**… well maybe except "iKiss", best episode ever! Review it you liked it… or even if you hated it and you want to throw a mustard sandwich at me! Haha I asked my friend if I could come to her homecoming and throw sandwiches at people, while she hit them with frozen meat. It was a very interesting conversation… but she said I couldn't come because she goes to school there and it'd be weird. D: I don't care if people think we're lesbians or something, I don't go there.**


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